katie logic: weddings, adulthood, friendships, oh my.

I'v been a bit scatterbrained as of late. I have a lot of thoughts, but they're not exactly organized. at least, not really. thank God for bullet points. bullet points are my friend.

OK, so Weddings:

• there's been a bit of a pause on the wedding planning. right now i'm getting more of the big things taken care of(ie: venues, officiant, colors, etc) because there's only so much i can do so early on, and for the most part, i did a lot of that a couple months ago. 
• we are in the middle of prom season, so glitzy long dresses are in stores and on sale!!! Soooo, bridesmaids dresses are slowly being acquired and its glorious, but that means more opinions and more decisions which will lead to even more opinions and decisions. So that's exciting and nerve-wracking. 
• the venues are officially booked(for the most part) which is also super exciting and nerve-wracking. i feel so blessed and can't wait to marry the best man in the world, but it's scary. thankfully i think the happy trumps the scary. LIKE WOAH!
• ITS HAPPENING!!! IT"S SO SURREAL!!! I GET TO MARRY THE BEST GUY EVER!!! 14 MONTHS FROM SUNDAY!!!! WUUTTTTTTT UPPPPP!

with those wedding notes come the true reason for this post. relationships.

      it is so crazy how much relationships change when you get married or plan on getting married. i'm starting to really see that now and i have a feeling i'm going to see more. i've heard things like "you can never have a male friend again because you're getting married" and "friendships don't need to change because you're married" and "you lose a lot of friends once you're married" and those statements and anything like those statements are both somewhat legit and a bunch of hooey.

• theses statements have a bit of validity but it really depends on the situation.

in regards to  "you can never have a male friend again because you're getting married":

• mainly, if you are a woman and you have male friends, and you get married AND if you are a man and you have female friends and you get married, things WILL change a bit. No matter what, if you respect and honor your spouse, if you plan on spending anytime with someone of the opposite sex it will be something discussed and understood and agreed upon by you and your spouse, period. And that's how i feel about that. 

•  i believe that those friendships only really change because you are constantly considering your spouse, but other than that, it shouldn't change too much. 

• i have many close male friends. one of them is in my bridal party, so there's that.

in regards to "friendships don't need to change because you're married" and "you lose a lot of friends when you're married":

•   i've noticed a lot of dynamics change in the last 4 months. certain relationships are becoming less important while others are resurfacing. it's so crazy. 

•  once married or even working towards marriage, your free time for others will lessen, therefore you will have to choose exactly who gets your free time other than your spouse, and that can be difficult and a CHANGE. 

• now that i'm engaged and planning my future and my "adult life" i'm discovering who find me important and who i truly find important. i'm finally understanding why some friends, after marriage trickle off, and some actually become closer. this realization will really become even more clear when the time comes to pick the guest list. stay tuned.

• i don't want to "lose a lot of friends" but i would like to really see who is important to me and balanace my time accordingly.

• my sposue will be getting the majority of my attention and friends who don't get that may actually not understand me or my spouse and may not even really understand love. that'll either be something to work on or something to let go of. in a good healthy relationship, spouse comes first.

in this next year

•  i want to strengthen the relationships i hope to continue far into my married life

•  i want to distance myself a bit from those who only seemed like convenience friends

•  i want to become even more of someone i find worthy of being friends with

end thoughts

• you really notice who your real friends are when you step closer into adulthood(in this case, marriage).

• you're more aware of your time and where it's going.

• so much of your time will be going towards your spouse(out of pure choice) and therefore you must decide who else wil take up some of your time as well even if it's just random phone calls and letters.

these may all be blanket statements and rather generic things that others would read and be like "no shit" but hey, i'm new to this so i'm noticing a lot.

that's all.

k/r

Halloween, because sewing takes time... and listy listy listy list.

1. Halloween: a time for people to dress rather out of character and gallivant for an evening to three evenings and act accordingly, because alcohol...

^the above "definition" that i have created is what seems to be the chosen definition for the teen/young adult media-focused-upon age group. (<---i don't know how to word that, but you get it, right?)

well, its WRONG. at least, in my opinion, tho others may disagree.

2. Halloween: is a time to...
A. gallivant(sober or not)
B. dress in costume that does one of four things:
     1. is so out of character, it is like the opposite of your own personality.
     2. so perfectly describes your personality, it's uncanny.
     3. is a more exaggerated version of yourself.
     4. something you secretly wish you were, but you only feel comfortable displaying it now.
C. enjoy time with friends
D. make memories
E. all of the above.

***DING DING DING***
I choose E. all of the above.
tho some may choose the silent F. none of the above. And, that's cool. enjoy.

I'm just stating my opinion of what Halloween is to me, and what i think it should be. This is of course, only on a surfacy level because I don't go much deeper on the subject.

So, yeah, that's my opinion, and now, allow me to narrow the focus in a bit to letter B. of "definition" 2. Costumes!!! Yes, that's right, I said costumes, and it's only July.

So, as i was saying, costumes.

I'm already thinking about costumes for October of 2014 and it's only July.

Reason being = boyfriend. lol

That's not the only reason but it is definitely one of them. 

I actually always start thinking this far ahead for my costume. Usually it is because it takes a lot of planning, sewing, and possibly hair growing to achieve the end result on/around the 31st of October. Only sometimes is it because i can't make up my mind and need 3 months to decide. So on top of the normal time and energy needed to put towards the costume, this year I have a second party to think about. Mind you, this is not because I think i am supposed to do a couples costume when I am a part of a couple. It is because I like the idea and he said yes :) I believed he used the word "honored" so that was nice <3

Ok then, so far, things that must be considered when prepping for a Halloween costume that I truly enjoy and truly care about, are...

1. time needed for sewing

2. time needed for hair growth (if necessary)

3. time needed to save money for possible purchases related to undecided costume

4. SECOND HUMAN(and their needs and wants)

That's only a small portion.

The rest comes with the costume ideas list. this list is very important if you truly are in the spirit of Halloween according to Katie. Usually this list would reflect only my thoughts and wants, but now it must reflect that of two people, AND especially, in the end, both of them together.  This is harder than it seems.

This list of costume couplings must have the following attributes(on my end, as I can't read his mind):

1. must be something i've never been before.

2. must be something I am rather aware of and even greatly enjoy.

3. must be something that is a good stretch away from how I act or look or it doesn't feel costume-y.

4. preferably creative and rather original or so well known, it can be recognized by many

5. preferably extra cute, extra badass, extra scary, or somehow, all of the above :)

6. preferably something that can be worn to a comic-con in the future ;) recyclable

now all that has been addressed, allow me to point out how completely unnecessary all of these thoughts are in July and at 2:40 in the morning.

But i digress. 

Anyhoo.

with that, I...we... probably I, as he probably agrees that this is unnecessary but is letting me be my tightly wound self and plan and write all this is out as i impatiently wait for October( I also like the cider and sweaters and shit), here is a tentative list of ideas. Possibly more to come, while more shall be removed, because at some point, we can only have one. comma comma comma. seems I like commas.

DA DA DA DAAAAAAAAA!!!!

ps: these are definitely more of a me list because much excite.

1. harley quinn and deadpool

because trolls!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

2. ryuk and rem from deathnote

because GODS OF DEATH.

3.  sylveon and umbreon

because pokemon.

4. antman and wasp

5. sailor moon and tuxedo mask

6. megan man and roll

7. judy jetson and apollo blue

and there are more.

lol we like options, BUT there is still a lot to consider as it has to be approved by both parties. as i said, tougher than i thought. of course, it's only july. :)

-k/r

Lappy love & Resolutions revisited: a nice little update

Lappy Love

alright, laptop acquired. i finally have a computer, thanks to my wonderful boyfriend. he gave me his old one and now i can be a normal 20something who follows youtube channels, online news articles, and takes a copious amount of quizzes!! woot!!

i can now...
1. create word documents
2. watch movies in my room
3. keep up with youtube channels like eat your kimchi
4. actually pay attention to the news and current events
5. pin even more frequently than i already do
6. set up my website and update other pages from home
7. not need to go to the library as much
8. BLOG...yeah. happening.
9. probably more, but nothing important enough for me to remember on my own.
10. and find memes like the one below :D

so, thank you to my awesome gentleman of a boyfriend!!

P.S. my laptop's name is sparkles magillicuddy the third. it's desktop background is ...

so, now that that little bit of word-vomit joy has been spewed, here's something else :D

Resolutions Revisited

it has been a bit more than half a year since i decided to have my first official new years resolutions!! it's been a really awesome journey so far and i guess i just wanted to update you all on my progress or lack of progress depending on the subject.

to recap my list, here's my list:

1. HEALTH: i plan to get back into my work out routine, add running/walking, take additional vitamins(fish oil) and Metamucil, have strict sleeping habits, cut down and eventually cut out energy drinks and pop, have a more strict and healthy diet with digestive and metabolism assisting foods, do yoga.

HEALTH in actuality: my work out schedule is a bit on the irregular side, but i have lost a few pounds, been taking better vitamins, and my dietary plan is a lot healthier than it used to be while also being a lot better for my digestive problems. i do feel like i've been getting more regular hours of sleep nightly, but i'm still not the best at mornings. i need to work on that whole "morning" thing as coffee is starting to become less effective. i almost never drink energy drinks anymore and only on rare occasions do i have a soda(yes, i said soda.) i have yet to run, i walk a bit more, i dont do yoga yet, and i slightly hoola hoop but have't really done that in a month. TONIGHT i shall work out a bit, and tomorrow i shall do a lot of walking and maybe start back into hooping. we shall see :)

2. READING: read at least 12 books in the year period, while adding books of the bible from time to time.

READING: i have been reading the bible off and on, basically been listening to an audio book of Mere Christianity (narrated by my boyfriend), and been slowly reading a memoir by Sting called Broken Music. this is all of the extra-curricular reading i have been doing since january. womp womp.

3. ART: make at least one painting per month and one drawing per week, add paintings to my etsy, update tumblr, pinterest, and facebook, apply to at least 2 shows in the year, look into what needs to be done to be a freelance artist.

ART: i've painted a lot and drawn a lot!! been updating my etsy, pinterest and facebook. need to update my tumblr and create my website soon. I've sold 2 pieces from my newest series and have more possible buyers. I have multiple places in the area wanting to have my work displayed in their shops! so far, the art front is going magnificently!!!! I do need to look into shows, but nothing i have found so far is all that appealing or soon. I also have a book about being a freelance artist that i need to read! definitely more to do, but i'm feeling good about it!

http://media-cache-ak0.pinimg.com/originals/a7/1f/42/a71f428042a5b248e400d9534c2ac799.jpg

4. HAIR: do not drastically change hair for at least a year, let it be gradual and dont let my emotions take over.

HAIR: i wrote that when i had dark hair...it is now white blonde again but that one drastic change happened, and since then i have been doing things gradually with my hair. hoping to even try growing it out :D

5. FASHION: wear a different outfit every day for the entire year or more.

FASHION: still in progress and i know i haven't taken a picture every single day like i planned to, but i'm trying. 

so that's life for now. thats how im doing. i'd definitely give myself a C+/B- on the resolution accomplishments, but hey, i still have a few months til a new new year comes around and by then there will be even more things to accomplish in life. 

i couldn't be more excited!!

-k/r

punching bags, ice cream, and all the likes.

disclaimer: this may be a bit scatterbrained(or maybe kind of word-vomit-ty) and not really so "informative" but more of a diary of my happy thoughts. therefore, you will either read this and get nothing out of it but just a little bit of my brain and my heart, or there's some hidden little bit of guidance. i guess that's for you to decide, so this disclaimer may be unnecessary.

Google definition of anger:

an·ger

ˈaNGgər/

noun

noun: anger; plural noun: angers

1.

a strong feeling of annoyance, displeasure, or hostility.

"the colonel's anger at his daughter's disobedience"

synonyms:

rage, vexation, exasperation, displeasure, crossness, irritation, irritability, indignation, pique

I felt this... all of this.

Today i felt the most intense anger i have felt in a long time. it did not last long and i didn't react as violently as i have in the past. afterwards, i didn't know what to feel. i didn't know what to do except talk and get slightly teary. today i felt unloved and disregarded and even abandoned. there's no detail to this story that is necessary. all that is required is that you that only about an hour ago, maybe less, i was LIVID. 

i was told to pray.

my boyfriend told me to pray.

***

prayer

-i'd put up the definition i found on google, but i found it ill-equipped

...i haven't prayed as much as i used in the last year. it's been rather sporadic and seemed to be only when i felt so at a lost that "oh i guess i will have to turn to God". i used to pray even in joy, but for a while, God angered me. praying just seemed pointless for a while. off and on for the last few months i've been falling in love with my faith again. it's been a slow and somewhat rocky fall, but only in the last month or so has it been less rocky and more smooth and even comforting. to actually take comfort in the lord, it's so choice. :) 

i prayed a bit before i wanted to type, but there will be more for me after. just being able to sit and think and talk and pray to God. being thankful for the greatness of life, asking for peace and understanding to come over, and talking about anything and everything. some my find that idea crazy, but as many have said, we are all snowflakes. i believe what i believe, and you believe what you believe, and if we happen to believe similar things, it seems we may have a bit more in common.

so i was told to pray, and what happened? i felt a sigh of relief. i felt calm, at least in comparison to the urge t throw things that i had only seconds before. so much peace. he said "pray" and it's like a lightbulb went off. lol i felt like a dope. a happy dope, at least. i didn't even think to pray at first, because i was so angry. the fact that all i needed was for someone so wonderful and caring to say "just pray" made things so much better. things arent perfect and i do intend to pray much more throughout the evening, but dang...

***

that wonderful man that told me to pray...he's pretty great. i went from being enraged and wanting to punch things and cry, to feeling at least 80% better JUST because of his comfort. it seems i am more and more thankful and excited each day for his existence in my life. it's kinda scary, but i like it. like like like like...yep. all the likes.

it seems i have notes about the awesomeness of relationships....who knew?

-never stop looking for something/someone that will make your life better.

-if he/she makes you smile when you should be crying...he/she just may be a keeper.

-if he/she helps you learn, helps you focus, and helps you grow, he/she is part magic.

-if he/she screeches like a velociraptor, he may just be part velociraptor.

-always feel loved. if you don't, there's a problem.

-hugs, even virtually, and kind of wonderful.

i'm not saying that i wouldn't pray if he wasn't around, i'm just saying, he helped.

find someone that helped. it's nice :)

-k/r